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Are Track Suits Suitable for Dictators or Anyone Else for that Matter?

Just saw Fidel on TV and thought what in heaven’s name is going on with the tracksuits – Chinese imports I suppose since the U.S. embargo cut him off ages ago.  ¿Por Que? Why, no snappy Under Armour or Juicy Couture Chinese knock-offs, to embrace his feminine side.  Poor thing, I am pleased he is at least wearing age appropriate senior citizen attire but a blue, gnarly, rayon track suit for the last demi-god, dictator of North American? 

I wonder if he just assumes anyone south of the Mason-Dixon line and north of 60 years old wears these things.  I rarely agree with Castro but this time he might just have a point, just go out to lunch in Naples, Florida and you’ll see what I mean. 

[Castro] I am pleased he is at least wearing age appropriate senior citizen attire but a blue, gnarly, rayon track suit for the last demi-god, dictator of North American?

I know I should have been listening to what he was saying since the world hasn’t seen or heard from him in awhile.  But I knew what was coming, the same “all Americanos are bad” bitter banter that my Tia Lolita is famous for.  She never forgets a slight, is great at blaming her adopted homeland for all her ills and of course knows who and what will cause the end of the world.  For Castro it’s the American provocation of Iran for my Tia it’s the greeters at Wal-Mart. 

When she goes at it, my mami knows to get out Tia’s V & V (vodka and vicodin).  My Tia was born ages ago in Tamaulipas, Mexico yet is very American in her vices and I thank God every day for that.  Unfortunately for us Castro doesn’t have a mute button or access to Tia’s V & V.

¿Por Que? Why do you think he stopped wearing the guerilla camouflage garb?  I actually don’t know why but am grateful for it.  Guerilla warfare garb is suitable for the young and virile ONLY, no one pushing past thirty-five years of age should attempt it.  As always I digress, but I was just on a date with a new paramour on the Cape and out he comes donning a Speedo!

Lord Christ, put some pants on, you’re over 50 – even Fidel knows what to wear at his age and he has been living in isolation on an island for 48 years, thanks to the bad Americanos. 

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