Rumor has it someone was handing out cold hard cash for suffering discrimination at the hands of the government. I needed to know the how, when and where ASAP.
I had my list ready. There’s my grievance against the DMV employee who laughed audibly when I told him I really did loss 60 pounds and my eyes did turn blue since my last driving test, the IRS for not allowing my mamita’s house to be considered a place of worship and the TSA for possible size profiling for only doing pat downs on size 6’s or smaller.
I was trying to figure out who to thank in case I was going to be a recipient. The Republicans never hand out cash so it can benefit others; they just make sure you never part with yours. That left the Democrats. And this was a handout, the stuff they are legendary for.
Surprisingly, the Senate and House in a bipartisan move along with the White House agreed to pay some $4.6 billion for “historic wrongs” to American Indians and Black farmers that were “discriminated” “unfairly denied loans” and “mistreated” by the U.S. Department of Agriculture (USDA). Who doesn’t want to come to America, where you get $$$ for getting F***ked over, everywhere else in the world you just get F***ked over. Nonetheless it warms my heart to see both parties can work together when it comes to erasing guilt.
Some of the claims date back to 1887 for the American Indians and several decades back for the Black farmers. Good things come to those that wait I say. Case in point, the richest Americans had to wait a staggering 22 months to get their interests protected by a Republican majority.
It turns out there are discrimination claims from Latino farmers for the same ill treatment from the USDA and the Obama government offered $1.3 billion to settle (maybe he thought this would make everyone forget he didn’t pass immigration reform) and the pueblo said no, it wasn’t enough.
Amigo’s SMART IS THE NEW RICH. You should have taken the money and ran. This is not the time to think one deserves more when hate payments only come around very hundred years or so. You know Hispanics are getting nothing when elected officials comfortably refer to elements of the Hispanic community as ‘defacto Americans’ and consider additional weeks of unemployment benefits a handout.
You know damn well when the Republicans take over the House next January the only apology anyone will be getting is for John Boehner staining the Congressional linens with his tears and tanning oil. And the only hand-outs will be more income tax breaks, which is great when you have income to speak of, but with a 15% unemployment rate amongst Hispanics the income appears to be what is missing to enjoy this goody. Of course there is always a lower estate tax to be thankful for, darn it, I think you need an ‘estate’ and I don’t believe inheriting your family’s Virgen de Guadalupe candle collection or your dad’s tequila shot glasses count.
I don’t know what the possibility is of collecting from the government for your grievances but you can always DREAM, oh wait I just remembered the DREAM Act is another initiative the pueblo is expecting the Republicans to squash and not apologize for now or in the future.
Estelle Gonzales Walgreen
Estelle Gonzales Walgreen is a first generation Mexican-American and entrepreneur of convenience enjoying the next phase of her quixotic life-journey fulfilling a dream to write in order to make people laugh sideways and avoid institutionalization. Most recently Estelle co-founded HS-News serving as its Editor-in-Chief since no one else applied. She cries when mistaken for Jessica Alba her reptilian manicurist and smiles when engaging in taco politics.