The Department of Homeland Security proudly announced today the successful prosecution and conviction of Emmanuel Rios for smuggling heroin into the U.S. The expectation would be that an exhaustive investigation took place and that Mr. Rios was highly skilled in concealing illegal drugs from authorities – NOT SO.
Earlier this year, the 23-year old was flying back to the U.S. from Guatemala, a country known for drug distribution routes, with 24 fruit juice boxes. Clearly Mr. Rios was thirsty but forgot that you aren’t allowed to bring in any foods from a foreign country – Dumb Move #1. He had put the “illegal” fruit juice in crates inside his suitcase – Dumb Move #2 – instantly bringing him to the attention of airport personnel at the Dulles Airport because the crates made his luggage heavy and misshapen.
Dumb Move #3 – no liquid in ANY of the juice boxes was found. Smart criminal operators know to create a diversion away from their scene of crime but not Mr. Rios. Inside the juice boxes were condoms with a light brown powder soon to be identified as heroin. TONTO. In the only quick-thinking moment of Mr. Rios’ police encounter, he quickly identified the powder as fruit juice powder that when mixed with water could soothe your thirst. Why powdered fruit juice would benefit from being carried in condoms remains unknown.
The airport officers and customs officials confiscated 41 condom wrapped packages containing heroin valued at $500,000 and Mr. Rios was sent to prison for six years followed by four years of parole. TONTO! TONTO!