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RACY JC Advice- Brother Likes it Picante
Photo: Brother you might also want to take some dance lessons: Salsa, Merengue, Tango... Dancing is a big part of most Latin cultures.
Dear Racy JC,
I am a black man that has always been somewhat attracted to Latin women, but I think it’s more so because of the provocative ways in which they dress. This is not the best way to really see a woman. I do prefer to get to know a woman who has more substance than what’s being projected on the outside. Fashions come and go, as does beauty, but if a woman is beautiful consistent from the inside, then she’s definitely got my attention. I’m wondering why I have such an attraction to women of this culture. And aside from the attraction, are there enough cultural similarities to make it work?
In closing I must say that I am very impressed and moved by just what I’ve briefly read on your site. I’ll take a little time to read more. Thanks for allowing me to express a few of my thoughts. Best to you!
Dear Lover of Latinas,
I am very excited to be writing about Latinas today because my book has been picked up throughout Latin America (and El Mundo—the world!). There, however, I am not Racy JC, but “Picante JC.” Love it!
Okay, brother, let’s talk about you getting your own picante action. I don’t know if I can explain why you are attracted to Latin women, except maybe the obvious: they are hot as hell. I know a few I wouldn’t mind switching teams for. Anyway, I think you sort of have the right idea on the clothing: it’s what’s inside that matters. But, provocative clothing is not necessarily a cultural norm for Latin women. In fact, my research found that most Latin cultures expect women to dress very conservatively. As I say in I Got the Fever: “ no cleavage or short skirts, and cover your arms and shoulders. If you don’t, it will be considered disrespectful, not to mention lend itself to extensive family gossip. And for Christ’s sake, no cursing. (I guess that leaves me out.)” I think this conservative attitude actually meshes well with black culture, which I report from my research: “When you meet your black man’s family, you need to address them with the highest level of respect—maybe more than you’re used to.” If you decide to take the plunge and start dating a Latina, you may have more in common culturally than you expect.
Religion is another area in which Latins and blacks tend to be culturally similar. In many Latin cultures, religion permeates the house, with altars and crucifixes aplenty (even over the bed). Even people who don’t practice Catholicism may hold tightly to some religious ideals. Ricardo, 45, Puerto Rican, tax assessor says, “You can’t extract religion from Latin families, even if they don’t practice. They might say they are not religious, but once you say something about Jesus they are like, ‘Wait a minute.’ They do grow up with the idea of Christ, the Holy Trinity, and the Virgin Mary—that is a woman you can’t fuck with. Literally.” This again meshes well with black culture, as blacks tend to also be very religious. I know, I know: Latins tend to be more Catholic and blacks more Christian. But you each accept Jesus as you savior, so that is a good place to start, right? For sure you will understand and respect religion, which should help you navigate any pitfalls.
And what about the good stuff? Blacks and Latinos seem pretty compatible in the sack. Latin men and black men are usually focused on meeting the woman’s needs in the bedroom, which tends to make any man a better lover overall. Let me warn you though, that her expectations are going to be pretty high if she has had Latin boyfriends. In my research, I found that the brothers did represent between the sheets, but Latin men far exceeded any other culture in terms of female satisfaction.
There are definitely a lot of differences between black and Latin cultures too. The most obvious: many Latin families speak Spanish, cultural foods are different, and Latinos tend to stick to traditional gender roles. (Dating a Latin women? You need to pick up the tab every time, brother.) As far as beauty on the inside, I think you are in good standing with the Latinas. Latin culture tends to be very warm, very affectionate, and not afraid to show it. Of course, you will never know how compatible you are with a Latina until you try. I think it’s great that you are intrigued with interracial dating and don’t be afraid, cautious, or worried about how society might define you. You have my permission brother. Go forth and date Latinas! And please keep me posted. Vaya con dios; Picante JC signing off.